Our portrait today is Nimatu Ibrahim. She is 31yrs and works as the Communications and Social Media Manager for the iSpace Foundation. When she’s not at work or surfing the net to read the latest news and trends, she watches Korean and Chinese drama (Kdrama and Cdrama).
Nimatu has the gift of agelessness. She is the forever sweet sixteen type of lady. Looking younger than her age comes with a variety of experiences – some good and others not-so-pleasant.
“There are instances where I fit in due to my looks. At other instances I had to tell my age and even prove it with a valid national ID”. There have also been instances where people took her seriously only when she revealed her age.
being ageless is my secret weapon
“At a point, I hated the “small girl” title especially when they address me like that. In Africa, we do not expect small children to partake in “adult” conversations. So, you can imagine when you are a child-like-looking adult”. However, she is very comfortable in her skin and wouldn’t change the way she looks for anything in the world. “I mean, I jokingly say being ageless is my secret weapon”.
Despite her extremely young-looking self, she has never had to “fight” to enter any space due to her age. This is because “what I lack in looks, I make up for in the maturity of my interactions. It’s mostly easy for people to guess that I am older than I look”.
In terms of relationships, older guys approach her always assuming that they are dealing with a much younger girl. And when younger guys approach her, they assume they are dealing with their age mate. Both of these two take it differently when they realise her actual age.
Older guys feel relieved while younger guys feel intimidated. In the case of older guys, she says “I have to keep reminding them of who they are dealing with. I have to remind them of my age and experiences which have nothing to do with how I look or my stature. There is a tendency for people to relate with others based on only what they see (look and stature). We need to correct such people. However, with younger guys, I have to always be careful not to pull the age card on them to make them feel comfortable”.
Age shouldn’t be a boundary in our interactions
“When I was in my late teens and early twenties, I liked interacting with older guys. However, in recent times, I realise that I like interacting with younger guys more. Lol, they probably keep me feeling younger. My current unofficial life coach is a younger guy. It’s been a very humbling experience knowing that someone so young could know so much about the world and life”.
Nimatu believes that age shouldn’t be a boundary in our interactions as she has come to find out by experience. She has learnt that some young people are very mature in their thinking while some older people are not. Therefore, we should present opportunities to everyone. “We should give people the allowance to prove themselves without being written off due to their age or looks”, she added.
When it comes to both men and women, Nimatu explains that looking younger than one’s age plays out differently. For her, looking younger seems to be more appealing in women than in the case of men. “We have a lot of cosmetics and surgeries that are thriving mainly on the promise of keeping women looking younger”.
She also thinks that “the popularly used and accepted “biological clock” plays a part in putting pressure on women to look ageless”. In the case of the men, they assume that the older he is the more mature he is. And that he has the ability to take care of a woman and keep a home. So, they don’t face the pressure of wanting to look younger.
She adds that the socially defined gender roles of the man taking care of the woman have a lot to do with this ageing dilemma. “After all, it is the older person that takes care of the younger one. Hence, the demand for men to look older and for women to look younger”.
Maximise the gift of agelessness that nature has given you
Her advice to others like her is to feel comfortable in their skin. Experience and wisdom will speak for them where looks/stature fails. Plus, they have the unique advantage of fitting into both older and younger groups if they learn to pull the age card in the older company and hide the age card in the younger company.
“In conclusion, I would say, learn how to maximise the gift of agelessness that nature has given you”.
She’s a gift to our generation,kind hearted
I agree
This is really a great piece. You are an inspiring person and i challenge you to keep the fire burning!
Go Nimat!
Thank you for your comment Stephen. She really is.
Wawww that’s wonderful 🥰. Would love to meet you one day
Thank you so much
It`s a small world, Mercy
This is so me. I will master how to pull my age xards to my advantage. Thank you.
I am glad it resonates with you. I hope you find joy in own journey